Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit. ~ e.e. cummings
As I read and pondered on Module 37: Self-Confidence Practical Methods for Building Your Self-Confidence Muscle I was struck time and
again by the realisation that rather than someone Trying To
Get Someplace, I'm someone Who Has Arrived Somewhere.
To say this was [and still is] a surprise would BE, ummmmmmm…
well, understating the obvious.
It occurs to me that I am no longer scurrying and hurrying
and all at loose ends. MayBE it is BEing in my 60th year or mayBE
it is just what it is.
Both Vision Interviews were “tiny adventures close to home”
for me. Amy Clover returned me to 1986, probably the most Touch And Go If This
Hasn’t Killed Me I Think I Am Here For The Long Haul year of my Life. I got
intimately acquainted with cognitive BEhavioural therapy that year, something I
have carried along with me though NOT something I have always remembered to
practise when my need to practise it has been the greatest.
Gratefully, I can Now say Amy’s swift yet gentle nudge in
that direction has encouraged me to shift into a new habit of using those tools
to write down, writing in pen or pencil, NOT on the computer, much of the noise
in my head that just bangs about like a toddler in a kitchen with all the pots
and their lids to play with. I have blown right through a few Okay I Am Now Officially
In The Zone Of Currie Crazies, finding myself travelling a more tranquil path
in what feels like moments, though really it is more like an hour or two… that
writing, I am Now remembering, takes a lot of energy, but oh my is it ever
worth the effort.
I loved Amy’s philosophy of Empowerment coming from the
inside. So often, despite knowing that my thoughts create my Life, I get to
thinking about things I KNOW won’t bring me to a happy place, encourage my
dreams, or let me BE of Service in the World. The capacity to STOP and empower
myself by challenging those runaway thoughts is always there. I suppose, well,
I suppose I got lazy and I also wandered far afield from this way of living and
BEing.
In Lisa Braithwaite’s interview I was immediately struck by
SIMILARITIES. I love when that happens. It seemed for me like I’d passed along a
long stretch of highway without seeing anything that looked familiar. As I read
her sharing about her panic attacks, yet more than the attacks, her way of accepting and dealing with them
as just part of Life, I had one of those moments where I caught myself nodding
and smiling as I read. There are aspects of that in MY Life, NOT the same but
similar, and my process is simply to accept that as true for me.
One of the most brilliant things Lisa said was that she encourages
her clients to embrace their uniqueness. She goes on to say that when you are
speaking, publicly, people will judge you, that in fact this is what we DO. It
isn’t a “bad thing” and in fact, it is amazing, really, how good it feels to
judge and BE judged. I love how this turned me round and made my thinking get a
little more sparkly.
Another part of Lisa’s interview that turned my similarities
meter up was when she said that we need to BE humble about how much we need to
learn. I have noticed in these past few months, since I BEgan participating in various online art challenges, how refreshing it is that no one, including ME,
thinks they are “all that” and how no one is running around and saying Me Me
Me, look at ME!!!!
Each and every time I participate I am encouraged, inspired,
and I LEARN SO MUCH. What’s more, what I share either in my posts or in my
comments to others, and oftentimes both, is HOW I am learning and WHAT I am
DOing to learn or practise. Just this weekend I received several emails from
people who have either asked me more about it, said how what I shared I am
DOing has inspired them to try something similar, and gave us a REAL connection.
NOT a “good job” and we’re out sort of comment, but a real connection
person-to-person.
So Now, back to e.e. cummings’ quote from this module’s Mission Brief. The thing about BElieving
in ourselves preceding taking a RISK
is utterly spot-on true. NO passing GO, no collecting $200. For way too long I
have had that turned the other way.
Amazing…
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