Superpowers Or Simply What Works?!

Taking A Stand 

The past week's module on True Strengths has been a little more slippery for me. I suppose that is in large part due to my BEing in a state of joyous anticipation [tempered by the realisation that nothing was certain] all last week. Normally such a predicament would bring out the less-than stellar in me. NOT so, this time.

I've been trying to get a last something squared away for over a year Now, and last week was the first time I saw light at the end of the tunnel. And was it ever shining bright. BEAMING it was!!!

And... there was also another light, slightly less bright, but that's where I kept focused. Quietly, it reminded me, stay Here, Now, and simply notice. BE. Listen.

Rather amazing, the way something NOT working out "my way" made EVERYTHING crystal clear. Sunday afternoon an email arrived that rained-out the week's picnic mood in a blink. It was like a freight-train barreling into me. That was the "feeling" I could identify. And it literally took my breath away.

But here's the thing: I'd been paying attention. I'd noticed how the possibility of a solution relieved me of the "thing" I'd been clutching like it was the Holy Grail. I'd noticed my calm, the peaceful way I went about things, ordinary things, all week. More than anything, I noticed that I've been choosing to hold onto it when letting go would have made things oh so much nicer...

So when finally, yesterday, I took the VIA Character Strengths Finder, amazed I was indeed to find that my Top Character Strength is Gratitude!! Now I might've been able to get that BEfore all this, but getting it THEN, oh me oh my!!!

My profile printout sits BEside me this afternoon with this: You are aware of the good things that happen to you, and you never take them for granted... 

I know this is all over the place, but sometimes it's like this, JUST like this! Absolutely, I am disappointed, and I wouldn't even try to say I am grateful for things falling through, apart, or just falling. But here's the other thing: When I took my focus off the situation as a problem I must resolve, since it was so clearly leaning toward resolution, I deeply enJOYed my freedom from its weight. And once I caught my breath after the freight-train plowed into me, I saw that I was completely at choice!!!

Even though I write and share my daily Gratitude Practise with others, something I've been DOing for 5 years Now, I didn't really get that Gratitude is a strength. MayBE I'd have considered it a value, but for the most part, until these past 3 modules I have had a big old pot of soup where values, strengths, and all other character-related THANGS were bubbling away. And then, having it come out as my "Top Character Strength" on the day after the grand solution turned to dust [or more accurately, mud, but...] well, that's pretty cool beans...

I'm just saying...

A Year With Myself... who'd've thunk?! Roaring on down the highway to 59 years old, I would've sworn I knew a thing or two about myself. And I suppose it's true, I DID, and I DO, but what I am discovering in this process is utterly flabbergasting.

This is the second time in 6 months that I have simply let something I was certain I needed to hold onto G-O!! GO!!! And the empty space, the feeling after, the loosening, relaxing, and coming back to myself, just ME, as I AM and AM NOT, it's so Very Sweet.